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Genesis 1 through 3

As inspired by this sf_drama post. I will be retelling the Bible until I get bored of it. In the future, I will probably look at a Bible instead of doing it by memory.

Genesis 1 through 3

So at the beginning of time God was like "Man it's pretty bare in here" and he made the universe, especially earth. And then he made animals and Adam and Eve, and then he realized he made billions of animals and he was all "oh crap it's gonna take forEVER to name all these dudes. Oh, I know, you do it, Adam!"

Adam and Eve lived in this place called the Garden of Eden, and in the middle of the garden there was this one tree that God told them not to eat the fruit of. I don't know why he didn't just put it like on top of a mountain or something, he's God, don't ask me. One day Eve was just walking around and this snake was like "Hey Eve you should totally eat some of this fruit" and Eve was like "lol you're just trying to get me in trouble." But the snake was like "aww, come onnnnnnn" so Eve ate it and gave some to Adam. And God went "Seriously? I gave you guys ONE RULE" and kicked them out of the garden. He also made death and childbirth to punish them. And then they had tons of kids and I guess their kids had incestuous kids and that's where everyone came from!

wow

Holy freaking... crap. My parents are getting a divorce.

They aren't even fighting or anything. There was no warning. It was just like "Oh, how was school, I had a hard day at work and by the way your dad is moving out tomorrow."

What. The. Hell.

Happy Halloween?

Holy crap, it's like no one remembered Halloween this year. I went trick-or-treating (I can't help myself) and like HALF of the neighborhood was dark. Not even exaggerating. And there were hardly any trick-or-treaters. By the last half-hour, people were giving out two or three handfuls of candy just to get rid of it all.

And I wore my fangs (they're like clip-on things and they're really awesome) to school on Friday since we didn't have school today, and the few people who noticed them acted like they didn't understand why I was wearing them.

What happened to my favorite holiday?
Report cards came out last week and I've gotten the "I'm worried about you" speech about five times since. Blah. I mean, they're not the best grades, but I've definitely had worse.

My science grade is the worst one, 79 point something. I could do better in that class, I think, but the teacher is so damn insane I don't really feel like making an effort. And she is insane --- on the first day of class, she told us, and I quote, "You can never be too afraid of your desk."

Yes. Your desk.

This is because the desks have Chemicals (you can hear the capital C) on them, and even though she cleans them with Lysol, you can never really get rid of Chemicals. She caught the girl next to me eating in class and freaked out, telling her that if she ingested any of these mysterious Desk Chemicals she would DIE. That's right. Die. I really don't know why we have class at such dangerous desks.

She also told us that the way they get iron in Total is by grinding up cars that people abandon at the side of the road. They grind up cars to put in cereal.

If I felt like we were learning anything we didn't already know, I'd probably be more forgiving, but we've just been going over the parts of an atom for a frillion years. OKAY. ELECTRONS AND PROTONS AND NEUTRONS. WE GET IT.

And that's really the only class I have a problem in. I have another C, but that one's been coming up anyway so I'm not worried about it, and my other classes are really easy.

EDIT: If the kid across the street doesn't stop bouncing his goddamn basketball I am going to kill him dead.
Predictably, right when it's least convenient I wind up having a frillion more things to do. The teachers suddenly all said "You haven't had any homework for three months, so let's make up for it THIS WEEK!" >_<
And I am grumpy because we had an academic team match last night and we sucked. We won, but it was really just crappy versus crappier. And I can't count, either.

"What's the six-letter word for crimes punishable by death?"

Me: "CAPITAL! ...oh wait."

Go me.
Yarrrr, I've come down with something. I feel okay---sort of stuffy nose, not really hungry---but apparently my inner ears have jumped ship. Can't stand up suddenly without listing to the right. And then I overcorrect and go the other way. It pretty much only stops when I run into something. I'm told it's bloody hilarious to watch.

Wound up with a load of homework tonight, but seriously. I'll be on tomorrow.
Stupid insomnia. Stupid doctor. Couldn't sleep till at least three. Didn't really feel that bad today, though, considering.

Can't really be on today, we're taking Reve out to eat and then I have to write a rap about the French Revolution. >_< Should also work on my script for Theater, but I probably won't.

My mom said when she came to drag me out of bed this morning, I said, "Ahhh, fishes."

It's good to be back. :P
Arr, my schedule's all crazy now. My doctor told me that going to bed at nine thirty will cure my insomnia.

Sure. I can't sleep at eleven thirty, so I'll be able to sleep at nine thirty?

But I'm not the one with the medical degree, so I'm giving it a shot. I do understand the need for a schedule. I just kind of liked the one I had. :P It allowed for procrastination and stubborn chinchilla-time, not to mention... free time. And television.

Oh, well.

<3
(in case you are wondering who this stranger on your friendslist is, hi, i'm rebecca.)

Been feeling really guilty lately for, you know, vanishing for over a year?

I'd explain if I could. No. Really. I do not remember why I thought it was a good idea to go away like that. but... I really did. I think it was something along the lines of 'I'm not responsible enough to have friends' or something retarded like that. Although, apparently, that is true, since I totally ditched you guys like that.

If you don't ever want to talk to me again, I totally understand. I just felt like I owe you guys this much, at least.
um. Yeah, I'm not dead. I'm really sorry for disappearing, I know you guys are probably pretty pissed. I was trying to be more responsible in school, and when I did, I basically stopped being responsible at all when it comes to you guys. I can't really find a middle ground. :\

ANYWAY. Right now I'm caught up with school things, so I'll be back. Not today, because we're going to visit Jim and Doris and the entire Birdwell family (except Craig), but, um, tomorrow. I hope.

You can all yell at me and tell me how pissed off at me you are then. And I know that was a really stupid thing for me to do, because I should have at least said something. I don't really know what the deal was. I plead temporary insanity? Or sanity. Or something. But, er, I think I'm back to normal now, so... yeah.

P.S. Brooke: Scar + me = squee. <147